Sociopaths, Psychopaths, and Narcissists. Understanding the complexity of dealing with these Entities. How to break free from it, and heal yourself, after experiencing a relationship with them. A MUST to read for women and men affected by this phenomenon.
First, let me start by saying that if you had the misfortune of getting involved with this type of person, or are presently involved, you have my most sincere condolences and I do wish for you to find the strength to not only break away free from them, but to heal from the devastation left from dealing with these type of entities. I don’t call them people, but entities for that is exactly what they are: evil abnormal entities, real life vampires. These people have no consciousness, no real emotions, or feelings.
They lack empathy for others. They are pathological liars. They are completely self-centered, egocentric to extremes and have an aura of self-imposed omnipotence. I used to thinking that they lack the ability to distinguish from right or wrong, since they have no consciousness, but no, they distinguish very well. The problem is that they find tremendous pleasure by harming and destroying others. They use and abuse them, until they have siphoned from them everything they wanted, or they get tired and move onto the next victim. I personally have also had the misfortune of falling madly in love with a man like this. To say that I went through a nightmare would be an understatement! Anyone who has dealt with these types of inhumane beings knows it is nothing like you have ever experienced before. If you don’t know how to break free from them, the devastating marks of the experience can leave you wounded for a lifetime. That’s how poisonous and toxic they are.
Furthermore, they will keep you entangled in their loop (if you left them) just for the joy of it and the sick pleasure they get from having control and a feeling of domination over their victims or targets. This is why it’s imperative to understand how these entities function, think and behave. This will be the ONLY way, for you to stop living in a continued state of mental confusion and break free from their influence over you. You MUST understand how they function as the sick evil beings they are in general, so you can see things from a different perspective. That will be the only way you will be able to put your emotions aside, and “stop trying” to understand what it’s impossible to assimilate and comprehend for a normal healthy human being.
For over a year and a half, he had me in a total state of confusion and emotional desolation. I kept trying to understand his behavior, to the point that I almost lost my mental sanity and my physical health. I have experienced like most women in this world, bad relationships. I’d met losers, felt drawn to the “bad boy” type, and have been cheated on. NORMAL things we all go through, not acceptable, or are even welcomed, or that brings gratification, but just normal. However, being in a relationship with a psychopath, sociopath, or narcissist is like nothing you have experienced before or never will; and I pray to GOD you never have to!
That is why once you are trapped in their sick web of deception and manipulation, it’s so easy to feel like you are losing your mind and going completely insane. No matter how happy, cheerful, confident, independent, financially secure, open minded, understanding, not jealous, possessive or controlling, free spirited or passionate you are, the psychopath narcissist individual you fall for will rip you off from the inside out, and make you feel like you have no an idea who you are any longer. They are masters of mental and emotional manipulation and will take you on an emotional roller coaster of your life!
In the bio I wrote for my website Crystal Healing For Women, I describe a bit of the nightmare I when through during my relationship with the most vicious psychopath narcissist type.
I spent a year and a half in a completely disturbing and dysfunctional relationship until three things happened that motivated me to run away from that relationship before it was too late.
1- During my relationship with him, not only did I almost lose my sanity, I also lost a lot of money, and I found out I had breast cancer. My emotions and mental state of confusion and depression were not helping at all and I was getting sicker and sicker by the day. I’m the mother of a wonderful son, and I needed to have my health to take care of him, but honestly, I was so broken at all levels, that I didn’t know how to even begin to put myself together or escape from his toxic influence over me. Here is where the other 2 amazing things happened and all I can do is to thank the almighty GOD for it.
2- After posting a comment on my Facebook page, a woman I didn’t know contacted me via Facebook. She was a counselor specializing in working with this type of entities and helped women dealing with them. She expressed that she knew exactly how I was feeling and wanted to help me. She helped me to understand who I was really dealing with, for this is not your typical bad guy, or cheater boyfriend, or immature jackass partner. NO, this is a psychopath narcissist and you must learn what you are dealing with.
3- By Divine Grace, I was introduced to the world of Crystals and Ancient Stones, and these powerful healing beings incredibly helped me and continue doing so.
Working with crystals helped me to alleviate the constant state of confusion I was dealing with. Furthermore, they gave me the strength to finally leave him and stop putting up with such a dysfunctional toxic relationship. They helped me to be more focused, stop thinking about him 24/7 and to be more logical and rational in my thinking. Working with Citrine was truly a miracle as I felt as if every time his toxic memories or thoughts of him will come to my mind, they would get magically blocked and pushed away, allowing me to be more focused and able to concentrate in other things, besides HIM. Once I was able to do this, I really used a lot of my time studying everything I could about psychopaths, sociopaths and narcissists. The more I learned, the more things started to make sense to me. I started to read the stories of hundreds of women and men sharing their stories, and also readying the studies and books on this subject. Once thing I realized (and now I think is funny), I remember telling myself, “Wait a second! I’m NOT crazy or imagining all these things or exaggerating things!” For every story I read, the common factor was that every single person having been in a relationship with one of these sick and evil entities had pretty much the exact same experiences!
The moment that I finally realized it was NOT ME, or my fault, or my "insecurities" as they try to make you believe, was the day I started to recover from the tremendous erosion suffered mentally/emotionally/spiritually/physically as a result of having been in a relationship with a psychopath narcissist, a real life vampire. For the charming prince really was a harming prince!
One day, my best friend from Spain who I haven’t talked to in a long time contacted me in such distress, telling me she needed to talk to me, that she was devastated in a complete state of confusion and very depressed. She had broken up with her boyfriend, but he would not leave her alone, directly or indirectly making her life a living hell. Then she said the magic words: “Do you know or have heard about the word psychopath?” The hair on my arms raised up and an electric sensation like shock, rushed all over my entire body! “Say what? DO I KNOW ABOUT WHAT A PSYCHOPATH IS??? Oh My God, this is not happening”, I said to myself. Now that I finally got my life back, my health back, my mind and sanity back, this is coming to me to make me relive everything? But this was my very best friend, and I saw how perturbed, confused and lost she was. It also helped me realize how far I had come, and that now I was in a position to help, not only her, but also other women.
One thing that I noticed is how disturbed my spirit was to listen to her no matter how much I wanted to. When you are deep into that toxicity, you are unable to think clearly. You are trying to make sense of what cannot be comprehended by normal human beings with normal healthy emotions and feelings. She would repeat things over and over again, trying to rationalize his behavior, no matter how much I tried to explain things to her.
Rationalization #1:“But he is really catholic and religious person! But he is the “perfect person” on the outside for everyone else to see! He is so charming, charismatic, very friendly, articulate, generous, intelligent, and funny!” This also reminded me of what I had heard many other women said. “But he always gives money and participate in charity events” “but he supported a children’s hospital and always was loving and caring with the children” “ But …… Yeah yeah yeah, have you ever heard of “a wolf in sheep’s clothing” or “Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde”? Yes, I’m quite familiar with that too. My ex was the purest of the Christians and went to church not once but three days every week! He was the most charming and charismatic man I had ever met. To the public eye, he was such a respected highly admired individual.
Rationalization #2: “If he doesn’t care or want to be with me, why is he trying to make me jealous?” It’s the typical “Triangulation strategy” they so masterfully play upon us. My ex was in a relationship with “his official” woman and the mother of one of his children, for 10 years and counting! He managed to pit both of us against each other with jealousy and rivalry. He completely convinced me that she was a psycho controlling witch, in denial that they were over and that only their child, and financial/business ties, kept them together. He also had a "psycho" ex girlfriend, and various other women, that always ended popping up in present conversations or sudden sexually explicit text (created by him). I remember asking him, "but if it's over between you two, or better yet if you never had anything with this woman, as you want me to believe, and she is just a psycho and a stalker, why do you keep entertaining her?” Ohhhh poor thing, of course it was not his fault, he was the victim as they were all those "psycho stalker women" that didn't leave him alone and wanted him! The manufacturing of ex psycho girlfriends in his life, other women desiring him is the “triangulation” strategy. I also used to hate "his official woman" for all the nasty things she said to me and how much she tried to hurt me. I ended up understanding that she is a narcissist supplier and she doesn't even know that. After 10 years living together and with a child in common, she is so damaged and wounded that she continues to find ways to "excuse" his wrongful behavior. I don't hate her at all, I just feel sorry for her and hope and pray one day she finds the help she so desperately needs and can get out to find herself again.
Rationalization #3:“When I seem to start to feel a little better, then these coincidences happen that have nothing to do with him, but brings back his memories or him back to my mind and life.” It has nothing to do with “coincidences” there are NO COINCIDENCES when it has to do with them. Everything is premeditated and carefully planned on their part.
Rationalization #4:“The sex was so good! The best sex and intimacy I have ever had in my life! How can you have such an amazing incredible sex with someone and not be love?” I was completely addicted sexually. Oh, do I know what you are talking about here, girl. Telling you how much he loves you, that you are different than any other, special, his true soul mate, when he is with you. Right after he leaves your presence, he is back to his double life, while doing the same to other women at the same time. Look, there is NOTHING they say you can believe, nothing! They will say anything to make you believe what they want you to believe, and keep you in the loop, and will continue to play mental games for as long as they want or they getting something from you.
Rationalization #5: “What about his irrational behavior?! He will suddenly disappear from my life, leaving me here wondering, going crazy in my head, then reappears, like nothing happened all charming, and caring and loving, promising me things and apologizing for hurting me.” I remember the time when I finally contacted my ex’s "official woman" to ask her directly if they were together in a romantic relationship or not because I was sick and tired of his mind games with me. That same Saturday morning, she contacted me to let me know he was taking them (mother and daughter) to a trip to Orlando, and if he didn't love her or was not in a romantic relationship with her, why he will do that? He got really mad, blamed me for creating havoc in his life and disappeared for an entire weekend, ignoring my texts and phone calls. Once again playing the "triangulation game" with both of us, plus giving me the silence treatment for behaving badly and contacting her, followed by him showing up days later becoming Mr. Prince Charming once again, promising things, apologizing for his behavior. I fell for it and we were once again in the "honeymoon period" that of course never lasted more than a few weeks before he started acting completely irrational. Games girl, nothing but mind games and the sick pleasure they get for getting away with everything.
Rationalization #6:“He just has left me, completely forgot about me like I never existed, like what we had never meant anything to him. How can he do this? How can he treat me like this?” This is a prime example of the "Devaluation & Discard" (or D&D) strategy. First they devaluate you, trying to make you feel that everything is your fault that things are not working because of you and your irrational behavior, (YOUR irrational behavior not theirs!) and then they discard you like trash. Once you are of no value to them, or they can't fool you any longer, or you start questioning their bullshit, or simply they have found their new target, they will discard you like you never existed. Many times, this is only temporary for they will always come back or show up when you least expect it! Please understand this very clear, they are NOT your friends, but your worst enemy. They don't miss you or love you or care for you and never did! It’s just a sick mind game they masterfully play with you and probably many others at the same time. The more you read and study about these type of dysfunctional personalities, the more you will understand why they do things as they do. I thank God, I had already started to work with a counselor and read quite a bit about psychopath narcissistic personality, so when the D&D started to happen, I was pretty much mentally ready for it. I'm the one who broke up with him because I was completely sick and tired of his lies, his sick mental games and irrational behavior. I started to stop to idolizing him. Instead, I questioned his integrity, his persona and for the very first time I refused to have sex with him and didn't fall for his charm or was "smitten" by him, as he will always said I was. I remember him sending me texts saying that "he loved me" but "my insecurities" where the problem, and that if I wasn't so impulsive and inpatient, things will work out between us, because he th